Vulnerability
by sideeffectsofjay
Summary: A night of scary movies quickly turns into something much, much more as Reid and Morgan reveal their deepest, darkest scars to one another. Established Moreid. Smut. One-shot.


**A/N: This one-shot contains detailed smut, and it's man x man. If you're uncomfortable with reading sex scenes, especially gay ones, you've been warned.**

Six months. Seventeen days. Twelve hours. Twenty-two seconds. That is precisely how long Derek Morgan and Spencer Reid have been 'more than friends.'

It all started in Memphis, in June, in a very busy and very bright emergency room. Reid recalls it as if it were just yesterday, every tiny detail stored into the recesses of his brain for all of eternity.

The case had gone down fairly smoothly. It only took the FBI's team of top profilers two days, four hours, and ten seconds to track down Nelson Scott, a friendly small town farmer who turned out to be not-so-friendly and planting things other than corn out in his one hundred and twenty acre field. Things had been going as good as you'd expect them to when hunting down a serial killer at-large. Agents Hotchner, Gideon, and Reid had raided the barn while Morgan and Prentiss cleared the house. Not to anyone's surprise, Scott barricaded himself into a horse stall with a hostage and a revolver, seeing right through any attempts for Dr. Reid to talk him down without the use of violence.

He'd barely had time to react when the barrel of that gun arched through the air and pointed right at Spencer's chest. The young agent took a breath, aimed, and fired. He was extra careful to follow through with his shot just as Hotch had taught him, but following through doesn't seem to matter when your gun jams and the person's pointing one at you doesn't. It started as a pinch, which escalated into the sensation of a wildfire spreading across Spencer's soft, delicate skin. He'd been wearing a kevlar vest, but the bullet hit within half an inch of the strong material, embedding itself into the scrawny man's shoulder instead.

Spencer spent six hours, five minutes, and fifty-six seconds having the lead dug out of his arm, and another eight hours and eleven minutes in recovery. Everything was a blur when he'd first woken up. Things presented itself in swirling, out of focus, colorful blobs, and he had the strange sensation that his mind was detached from his aching body. It was a hand that gently pulled him back into the throes of reality. It wasn't just any hand, but a hand much larger and stronger than his own. The hand had once belonged to Derek Morgan, but it now belongs to Spencer. He grips it tightly as they sit on Morgan's couch, his thumb absentmindedly tracing the knuckles of a man who confessed his love to him that day.

"Derek, I don't like this." Spencer whimpers as an otherworldly demonic-looking, very pale girl climbs up out of a well with black, stringy hair covering the majority of empty, all-seeing sockets where her eyes should have been. He presses himself hard against his lover, using Derek's buff shoulder as a shield for his eyes.

"Awe, it's okay Spence. It's just a movie." Derek repositions his body, twisting on the couch a bit so that he is facing his boyfriend more directly. Strong, warm arms trail their way around Spencer's skinny frame. He melts into the touch instantly, closing his eyes and reminding himself that, with Derek, he is safe.

Daring to uncover his eyes, Spencer looks adoringly up at Derek, whose eyes are trained intently on the screen in front of them and do not so much as flinch when the girl-creature-devil-thing lets out a high-pitched, never ending, chill inducing screech.

Feeling a soft fluff of hair nuzzle into his neck, Derek breaks his gaze away from the movie and uses a hand to tilt Spencer's chin up, getting lost in those beautiful doe eyes as he closes the space between their lips.

"Mmhh…" Reid lets a soft, pleasurable moan escape his lips, reaching up and using his bony hand to press Derek's big, sweet lips into his own, soft pink ones as hard as he can. The younger man dares to trace his tongue across the crease of his boyfriend's mouth, stopping for just a second out of sheer surprise when he's granted entrance.

Instead of fighting for dominance, Spencer gently swirls his tongue around Derek's, willing himself to keep control over his own body until the older man becomes comfortable with this new interaction. Slowly but surely, he feels the tense muscles of his lover relax one by one, and takes this as his cue to venture a little further.

Despite popular belief at the office that Spencer is socially inept, awkward, and dare they say, a virgin, the Doctor is not entirely inexperienced between the sheets. He's had exactly two boyfriends in his life, the second and hopefully last being Derek Morgan. Though the first guy didn't work out, there had certainly been no shortage of passion-filled rendezvous and more than one neighbor kept hopelessly awake through all hours of the night.

Derek, on the other hand, has only been with women. He's known that he's bisexual since his his high school days, but has never felt comfortable enough to act on those feelings until Spencer came along in all of his dorky, geniusy, beautiful glory. It had taken Derek twenty-six days just to kiss Spencer on the lips, and that was as far as he'd permitted his Pretty Boy to go until this very moment.

"Derek," Spencer pants in between feverish kisses, moving his hand from the back of Derek's neck and letting it trace its way onto his toned chest. God, he can feel the tightening and untightening of those abs even with a layer of clothes between his sweaty palm and Derek's bare, deliciously dark skin.

"Hmm?" Derek surprises himself at how breathless he is, and just how difficult it is to get anything out at all.

Spencer pulls away suddenly, the ghost of Derek's lips haunting his almost immediately. Stopping just when things are starting to get heated is the last thing he wants to do, but Spencer makes himself do it. He knows he has to be careful with his boyfriend. Refraining from any kind of psychical action aside from tongue-less kisses has proven hard over their time together, but Spencer has to. He has to give Derek time to trust him; time to trust another man with his body again.

"I love you." Spencer is the one to finally break eye-contact, resting his head against Derek's chest and savoring the steady thump of his heart as he rests a hand on his abdomen, not daring to go any lower than that.

"Spence, what's wrong?" It isn't Derek's many years as an expert profiler that leads him to the rising suspicion that something is troubling Spencer, but rather the way his voice falls significantly, along with the eyes that radiate nothing but admiration every time Spencer looks at him.

"I guess I just...wish you trusted me, is all." He feels Derek's chest rise higher than ordinary, falling back into its usual routine once he's let out a deep sigh. Thick yet gentle fingers weave their way in and out of Spencer's curly hair, who relishes in the comfort of it as he waits patiently for a response.

"I do trust you," Derek whispers, just barely loud enough for Spencer to hear. His boyfriend removes his head from his chest and looks at him, startled by the weak and broken tone that now overtakes his usually smooth, confident voice.

Despite the lack of reassurance in that voice, one look in Derek's eyes is all it takes for Spencer to know that he is telling the truth. He can't imagine how he'd react if he had to go through the unrelenting hell that had been Derek's childhood. Spencer thinks that he'd never let anyone touch him again, much less a man, and much less on the more intimate parts of his body.

"I know you do." Spencer caresses Derek's cheek gently as tears well up in his eyes at the thought of a monster taking away that spark of innocence. What Carl Buford did to him was unspeakable - so much so that Derek has never went into detail about it. The only reason Spencer knows is because it had been revealed during one of their cases in Chicago. Buford had attempted to pin a series of homicides on Derek, who was forced to finally face the demons that he'd buried many, many years ago.

"Don't cry, baby." Morgan coos, his heart squeezing in his chest as he observes the pained, watery eyes gazing up at him. He pushes Spencer's face up and kisses him tenderly, not caring about the salty taste of tears on his lips. "I love you so much. I'll show you one day. I promise." Derek is forced to look away once the words spill out, regret bubbling in his chest as he questions how truthful they are. He isn't sure if he'll ever be able to be intimate with Spencer, despite the undeniable love he shares with him.

"You already show me every single day." Spencer sits up and tucks his legs underneath of himself, leaning into Derek and stroking his bald head with long, skinny fingers that were given to him for this very reason. "I don't need...that...to know that you love me, Derek." He rises up on his knees and swings one leg across Derek's body so that he is straddling his lap, careful in his positioning so as not to give the man underneath of him the wrong idea. "I'll wait a million years, if I have to." Spencer wraps his arms around Derek and interlocks his fingers behind his neck, resting his head in the area between his boyfriend's shoulder and chin that seems to be molded perfectly for him.

They sit like that for a few minutes, Derek returning the embrace with a gentle touch of his own. He knows how reserved Spencer can be when he touches his back, and is always extra gentle with the area. While Derek has emotional scars that torment him even in his sleep, Spencer has very real ones, a haunting reminder of a thick stick yielded by Tobias Hankel, the man who had almost destroyed Spencer's innocent soul. Derek had watched helplessly with the rest of his team for two days as the psychical and psychological torture played out on a live feed in front of them. He'll never forget the almost inhuman yelps of pain that escaped Spencer's lips every time that stick made contact with the bare skin of his back, accompanied by a sickening snap. To this day, Spencer still hasn't let anyone see him with a shirt off. Not even Derek, who shares a bed with him every night.

"Pretty Boy?" Derek's deep yet soft voice fills the comfortable silence, causing the man in his arms to stir slightly. "Let's go lie down. This movie is scaring you and I don't want you to have bad dreams."

Spencer grunts lazily, not providing an answer either way. The cuteness of his reaction makes Derek's heart flutter, lifting some of the heavy thoughts that had started to make their home within it. "Come on. I'll hold you."

Derek's hand fumbles for the remote blindly. He finds it in the cushion of the couch and flips off the television, momentarily taken aback when Spencer tightens his grip around his neck and begins to whimper softly. "Derek," he starts, but the older man is already starting to stand up, forcing Spencer off of his lap and wrapping an arm around him protectively. "Derek!" He says again, more urgently this time as he bores his fingernails helplessly into Derek's bicep.

"Shh, shh." Derek whispers, finding Spencer's hand in the dark and latching onto it protectively as he guides them through the pitch-black living room and into their bedroom. "The dark can't hurt you, Spence. I'm right here." Derek guides Spencer to sit down on the bed and doesn't dare let go of his hand as he uses his other one to flip on the bedside lamp. Spencer's grip loosens instantly, retracting entirely when he lets go of Morgan's hand and rolls onto his side of the bed, digging his long legs underneath of the warm comforter.

Derek stands there for longer than what any normal person would, admiring how adorable Spencer looks as he becomes enveloped in warmth, daring to let his eyelids droop and eventually close all together. When he doesn't feel the other side of the bed sink in reaction to Derek's weight, he cracks one eye open and raises an eyebrow at him.

"Derrrr," he whines. "Hold me please."

Unable to resist the request of Spencer's sleepy, slightly frightened voice, Derek pulls back the blankets and slides underneath of them, smiling to himself when Spencer rests his head in the crook of his neck and snuggles into him. Silence encases the dimly lit room, save for the slowing breath of the man next to him and the thump of his own heart beating in his ears.

Playing with Spencer's hair again, Derek allows his mind to wander to the one place that it can't help but go every time he lays down and flirts with sleep. Not being able to fight it any longer, Derek closes his eyes and is met with the interior of an old, dusty cabin. With the sight comes the musty smell, and shortly thereafter comes the towering, threatening man with the voice that still makes him shudder, despite being a full-grown FBI agent now.

Spencer opens his eyes once more, concern shining in them as Morgan's gentle caresses turn into light pulls, growing harder and more intense each time the strong man flinches next to him. "Der?" he asks softly, placing his hand on Derek's chest and starting to rub in soothing circles.

Derek doesn't answer at first, but lets his hand fall onto Reid's cool pillow as he releases his hair. As he always is, Spencer is patient, waiting for Derek to come to him instead of chasing after his thoughts aggressively. After ten whole minutes, Derek's bottom lip starts to quiver.

"I - I thought it would be really cool," he starts, his voice sounding weaker and more lost than ever. "I'd never been to a cabin in the woods before. Hell, I'd never even been to a lake before."

Every fiber of Spencer's heart stretches and snaps as he realizes what Derek is talking about. He pushes himself up on his elbow and stares down at him, but Derek doesn't open his eyes to look back.

"Derek, you don't have to -"

"Spencer, please." He doesn't have to finish the request for his boyfriend to understand. Spencer falls quiet, allowing his head to fall back onto Derek's chest as he absentmindedly rubs his tummy in a back-and-forth motion. With every word that Derek speaks, Spencer can both hear and feel the heart underneath of his cheek beat a little faster and a little harder.

"The first time he took me up there was really fun. I was twelve at the time. He taught me how to tie a fisherman's knot, and I even managed to hook a little bass. The second time, he let me have a drink. He brushed up against my arm…'accidentally' bumped into me. I didn't think anything of it at first. I was just happy to have a father-figure back in my life."

The sheer stillness of Derek's body against his is almost scary to Spencer. He's so used to having his hair played with or his arm brushed up and down. The lack of contact is concerning, but Spencer continues to rub Derek's tummy, giving him the space that he so desperately needs while still offering some form of comfort.

"The third time, we went swimming in the lake. It was normal at first, until he told me to take off my clothes. I questioned him, and that was the first time he yelled at me. 'I said take your fucking clothes off!'"

Spencer, who hadn't been expecting Derek's imitation of Buford, jumps at the sudden rise in his voice. Derek doesn't seem to notice, since he makes no effort to soothe him. Spencer settles back down into his chest, his hand now resting perfectly still on Derek's tummy.

"What was I supposed to do, Spence? I was just a kid. I...I did it. That was the first night that he really touched me. I'll never forget the way those cold fingernails trailed down my stomach and…" Derek stops, unable to finish the memory. Next to him, Spencer lets a tear fall onto his shirt. Again, Derek either doesn't notice or doesn't seem bothered by it.

"He told me, 'If you tell anyone, I'll make sure you never get out of South Side.' So I didn't tell. He was my only hope of getting my Mama and sisters out of that hell hole. I needed that football scholarship. The touches got more obvious as time went on, until one night…"

Spencer reaches up and swipes away fresh tears that stream down Derek's cheeks, seeming to chase after one another to see which will roll off of his chin first. Spencer doesn't give them the luxury of the race, catching them as quickly as they appear. He so badly wants to tell Derek to stop, that he doesn't have to talk about it anymore, that Spencer doesn't want to hear it anymore, but this is something that has been eating the dark skinned man for a long time. If he is ready to tell someone, Spencer has to be ready to listen.

"He said we were just wrestling, but after a while he flipped me over onto my stomach and pinned my arms behind me. My face was buried into the carpet and I couldn't breathe. Couldn't scream. He pulled down my pants and I...I heard a belt buckle...and then there was just this pain. It was unlike anything I'd ever felt before. It was like someone stuck a fuse inside of me and the flames rolled all the way up my spine. I cried. I cried so hard, Spence."

Fresh tears sting Derek's cheeks, but he clamps his thumb and forefinger around both of Spencer's tiny wrists before he can wipe them away. He takes a few deep, controlled breaths, turns halfway onto his side, and opens his eyes to meet Spencer's.

"I begged him to stop, and do you know what he said to me?" Spencer shakes his head slowly, unsure of whether or not he was actually supposed to answer the question. "He said, 'You better man up, boy. Look up to the sky.'" Derek averts his gaze upward, quickly snapping his eyes shut as he threatens to lose control of his emotions. A gentle, almost phantom touch pulls him back down again. He reopens his eyes to see Spencer looking up at him, his skin pale and his eyes terrified. He pulls his fingertips away from Derek's cheek when they make eye contact.

Derek's heart breaks. Here is a man that is fully and wholeheartedly in love with him, despite all of his flaws and his inability to please Spencer sexually. He looks deep into Derek's eyes with every ounce of pure love the world has to offer. He doesn't judge. He doesn't doubt. He just looks at him, reflecting the torment and sadness that Derek feels in his very own heart.

Eyes closed again, Derek fumbles for that small, incessantly cold hand that he had claimed as his six months ago. Once he finds it, he places it gingerly back onto his stomach, encouraging Spencer to continue with his little back-and-forth motion. "It's okay, baby. I know you aren't him. I trust you."

For a long while, Spencer keeps doing exactly what he's been doing. He doesn't increase pressure or change the course of his hand by a single inch. He just complies with what Derek had asked of him, watching in silence as he relaxes more and more with each passing stroke. Finally, he lets his hand fall limp.

"Don't stop," Morgan whispers, his breath raspy and almost nervous sounding.

"Derek." His eyes flutter open at the sound of his broken name. Spencer's eyes reflect seriousness and a longing for attention, which Derek gives to him fully and undivided.

"Yes? Baby, why did you stop? I was starting to get used to it."

Spencer smiles sadly at Derek, wishing he could stroke his belly for the rest of the night if that is what makes his comfortable. He has nightmares of his own though - ones that Derek has heard about but never seen. "I want to show you something, but I don't want you to be uncomfortable." Spencer absentmindedly starts to pick at the crook of his arm, a dead giveaway as to what that something is.

"No, Pretty Boy. You don't have to show me just because I opened up to you about that. I did that for myself, not to -" Derek falls quiet when a long finger rests against his lips, silently asking for him to stop. He does so without hesitation, displaying the same level of understanding that Spencer had when Derek begged him to shut up and listen.

"I want to, Der. It's just...I'm going to take my shirt off and well...I know you don't like that." His voice becomes increasingly lower with each word, trailing off into nothing as his eyes look anywhere but at Derek.

Next to him, Derek's heart swells with the love that has been absent his entire life. It's amazing and utterly beautiful to him that, despite being about to show Derek something that no one has ever seen before, Spencer is still more concerned with Derek's feelings.

"Come here," Derek instructs softly, sitting up straight in the bed and pulling Spencer into a loving embrace. "Are you sure you want to do this?" he whispers into his ear, planting a gentle kiss into his soft, fuzzy hair. Spencer nods quietly, taking in the sweet smell of Derek's shirt pressed tightly against his face.

"Spencer, look at me." Spencer pulls away from Derek's chest, doing as he is asked and locking eyes with the man that he knows he will love for the rest of his life. They stare deeply into one another's souls for twenty solid seconds.

Spencer remains unmoving - unblinking - as Derek climbs onto his knees and positions himself in front of him. Derek doesn't take his eyes off Spencer's for a single moment as he cups his cheek in his large hand, effectively concealing nearly half of his face. He leans in for a sweet and gentle kiss, swallowing his nerves as he pulls away and decides there is no going back.

At first, Derek just lets his hands rest on Spencer's shoulders. They fall down his long torso at turtle speed and stop again at his delicate rib cage. As badly as Spencer wants to look down and see his lover's strong hands resting tenderly against his rapidly beating chest, he keeps his eyes locked in on Derek's, acting as an anchor for the man who is so clearly nervous and unsure of himself.

After stopping and reevaluating several more times, Derek's fingertips finally graze the hem of Spencer's tee-shirt. A look of terror and uncertainty flashes in his eyes, but is calmed when Spencer reaches down and cups his own hands on top of Derek's, gently encouraging him not to pull away without scaring him off in the process.

A bolt of electricity shoots through Spencer's entire body as one of Derek's thumbs dares to slip underneath of the shirt and graze his bare skin. His body's reaction isn't sexual in nature, but more of an intense longing for Derek's touch. Aside from holding his hand, Spencer has never felt skin-to-skin contact with the man of his dreams before. He closes his eyes and lets the sensation engulf him, opening them again when the hands on top of his shirt begin to tremble.

"Shh. It's okay, Der. You don't have to do this. Just take your time, okay?" Derek nods his head in response, pulling his body away from Spencer slightly but not moving his hands. He closes his eyes and just breathes for a while, looking at Spencer determinedly once he's comfortable again.

"I could help you, if you want," Spencer suggests, his hand on top of Derek's but unmoving until he is given the okay to do so. Derek slowly nods, and Spencer traces tiny circles onto the back of his hand for a few minutes before tightening his grip around them and guiding them to take hold of his shirt.

Morgan complies to Spencer's direction, his eyes slowly wandering away from his face and down to where all four of their hands rest, just waiting to lift up the fabric and reveal the secrets hidden beneath.

"I love you, Der." Spencer starts to speak softly as he guides Derek's hands upwards, a cool sensation nipping at his skin as his shirt comes up half an inch.

"I love you, too," Derek responds, his breath a bit raspy.

"Do you know that I've loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you?" The shirt comes up a few more inches, revealing more of the pale, bare skin below.

"I-I know." Derek dares to let two of his fingers trace just below Spencer's belly button, surprising even himself when he doesn't recoil at the sensation.

"I was so happy to wake up in that hospital and see you." Spencer takes one hand away from Derek's, and then the other, talking all the while as a bit of a distraction.

"I should've...should've been there in the barn. Should've protected y-you." A lump forms in Derek's throat. He quickly forces it back down as he raises Spencer's shirt up to the top of his ribs, revealing a set of soft, tender abs. They aren't as big or as prominent as Derek's, but they are perfect. He lets his finger trace over each and every one, admiring the way that Spencer's skin shimmers in the soft glow of the lamp.

"Awe, no Der. You couldn't have known my gun wouldn't go off. The important thing is that you were there afterwards. You didn't leave me alone." Spencer slowly starts to sit up straighter, placing one hand on Derek's forearm. He keeps talking as he raises his arms into the air, taking over for Derek and pulling his shirt completely off. He drops it onto the floor next to him and sits perfectly still for a moment, watching with intent as Derek's eyes travel every inch of his bare torso.

Without even thinking, Derek reaches out and touches a small scar to the left of Spencer's perfect collarbone, muttering "I should've been there," as a tear streams down his cheek. Spencer lays back down on the bed and Derek chases after his lips, giving him a wet, tear-filled kiss.

"Is it okay if I hug you?" Spencer asks, unsure of how Morgan will react to being pressed against his bare skin. Derek nods, and lets Spencer pull him down on top of his chest. He stiffens for a moment, but starts to relax at the sound of Spencer's gentle heart. He brings a hand back up to trace around the sound of it, his fingertips barely grazing the skin as he tests the waters.

"Hold me," Spencer says, arching his back and feeling a weight lift from his shoulders when Derek wriggles his hands into the newly available space. He's tempted to caress every inch of Spencer's soft skin, but keeps still against his sensitive back.

"Derek, I'm going to turn over now." Before Spencer can change his mind, he wriggles out of Derek's embrace and turns over onto his stomach, his hand clenching the sheets into a ball at the sudden vulnerability.

"Spencer…" His name is all that Derek can conjure when he sees all of the endless, crisscrossing, pink lines that collide violently against his undamaged skin. They run parallel, perpendicular, and everything in between. It is Spencer's turn to flinch and tense when Derek's finger starts to trace over one of the scars. Derek pulls away fast, regretting what he's just done.

"I'm sorry, baby." Guilt weighs heavily in his voice. Spencer bites his bottom lip and lets his tears soak freely into the pillow, thankful that Derek can't see him.

"No one has touched me there since...since Tobias."

"It's beautiful," Derek breathes, resisting the urge to trace every single one of the scars across Spencer's lightly freckled back. "I mean...you're beautiful. You're perfect, Spencer. You're so perfect." As he speaks the words, Derek has never felt more honest in his entire life.

"Could you...could you touch me again?"

"Are you sure?" Derek's hand hovers above Spencer's back, worried that one wrong move will trigger memories of Tobias and ruin Spencer's trust forever. The younger man nods into the pillow, clenching his eyes shut tight.

"Okay, baby." Derek brings his fingertips back down. Spencer jumps again. "Shh. It's okay. It's Derek. I'm not going to hurt you, Spence. You're okay." He continues to whisper sweet-nothings from his spot above and behind Spencer, tracing every last inch of every single delicate marking across Spencer's back.

The sound of a stick slicing through crisp air suddenly invades Spencer's ear, and he cries out to Morgan in the same way he did when he'd been scared by the darkness. "D-D-Derek...Derek!" He can almost feel the white-hot flames inching across his body at every snap, screams of "Confess your sins, boy!" ricocheting within his skull at full volume.

A yelp escapes Spencer's throat, and Derek instinctually locks his lips onto his shoulder, tracing them gently over the scars and stopping every few inches to apply a pressured kiss. Spencer relaxes almost immediately, his hand finally loosening its grip on the wad of sheets at his side.

"Oh, Derek...that feels good." At the sound of his pleasure, Derek intensifies each and every kiss, using one hand to gently grip Spencer's side. "D - Derek...please…don't...don't s-stop."

The soft begs coming from the man beneath him is all it takes to ignite a raging fire from deep within Derek, warming the passion in his soul that had once seemed like it was lost forever. He swings a leg over top of Spencer so that he is straddling his backside, wasting no time in returning his lips to the intoxicating skin. His kisses begin to turn into soft nibbles. "Ow!" Spencer howls out, when Derek sinks his teeth a little too deeply into his shoulder.

As a response, Derek begins to suck on the skin around his accidental bite mark, sticking out his tongue and tracing around the area to dull the aching pain. "Oh my god…" Spencer groans weakly, every inch of his body tingling in desire for more.

After tracing soft, tedious kisses all the way down his spine and back up again, Derek grabs a fistful of Spencer's hair and pulls it back towards his chest, earning another satisfied moan of pleasure from the man beneath him. "Tell me how much you need me," he commands in his ear, gently sucking on the now exposed skin of Spencer's tender neck.

"I need you so fucking bad," Spencer whimpers obediently, the friction between his pants and the mattress underneath of him rapidly growing. Derek purrs in Spencer's ear as he traces his fingertips up and down his spine, effectively drawing out shudders from the aroused genius.

"Ah, Pretty Boy has an ugly mouth after all," Derek teases, nibbling on the sensitive cartilage of Spencer's ear as he feels a familiar twitch in his sweatpants. Spencer feels this newfound pressure nudging its way into the small of his back, and flips around so that Derek is straddling him from the front, their dicks dangerously close to rubbing against one another through their pants.

Every single clock on the face of the earth must come to a standstill when the two men lock eyes once again. Derek gazes down longingly into the light brown orbs of Spencer's eyes, silently begging for him to do something - anything - to satisfy the lustful ache coursing through his veins. He searches Derek's pupils for any sign that he might feel the same way, but is met with hesitation instead.

"Derek, lie down." Spencer nudges Derek off of him and back over to his side of the bed, instantly curling up against his chest without an ounce of disappointment on his face. They are quiet for a few minutes, each of them gaining their wits about them, before Spencer speaks again. His voice is delicate and careful, graciously dancing around the elephant in the room without adding any additional discomfort on Derek's part.

"I don't want you to ever feel like you need to do anything just because you think I want it." As Spencer speaks, Derek trails his fingers up and down the exposed skin of his side, the touch evoking goosebumps all over Spencer's body.

"Spencer, this is something I want. I just...need things to go slow."

"Derek, baby." Spencer raises up onto his elbow and looks contently at the somewhat apprehensive man lying beside him. "I can go as slow or as fast as you need me to. All you have to do is say the word and I'll stop. Do you trust me enough to believe that?"

"Yes, I do." His voice is confident and sure of himself for the first time all night. Spencer watches in adoration as Derek allows his eyes to screw shut behind his lids, indicating a level of trust that he's never given anyone before now.

Slowly, carefully, Spencer finds Derek's lips and meets them with his own, the bulge in his pants pulsating when his tongue is granted access once again. Just as before, Spencer gives Derek plenty of time to relax into the motions before gently taking the wheel and carefully starting to steer him in a direction he never thought he'd be going with Derek Morgan.

Spencer unglues their mouths and plants gentle kisses all along Derek's jaw line, tickling the neglected sweet spot of his neck with those silky lips, intensifying the gesture each time he repeats it. Unlike Spencer, Derek is deathly silent at the touch, too tense to let the tiniest of moans cross his sealed lips.

"Are you okay?" Spencer whispers, stopping just long enough for Derek to nod unsurely. In a leap of confidence, Spencer flips over and straddles Derek's waist, forcing himself to hold back a cry of pleasure when their dicks touch through two layers of fabric. Derek visibly stiffens. Spencer lays down on his chest and allows him a break, slowly and inconspicuously starting to grind their hips together.

"S - Spencer…" Derek stutters, keeping his eyes closed tight but not asking the man on top of him to stop. Spencer sits straight up on Derek's waist, debating whether or not he should continue.

At the sudden pause in the moment, Derek opens his eyes and finds Spencer's, desperate for something familiar and loving to hold onto as a wave of weak vulnerability washes over him. His dark pupils widen slightly when Spencer makes a move to lift his shirt, and Derek clamps a hand over top of his to stop him. The look in his eyes is full of sheer terror, and Spencer leans back down for a deep, tender-hearted kiss.

"It's okay, baby. Let me see that beautiful chest of yours." A few more kisses later, Derek slowly removes his hands and places them on Spencer's hips, falling in love with the way the soft skin feels in the palm of his hands. Spencer doesn't stop kissing him as he slowly lifts up Derek's shirt and explores with a gentle hand, feeling the muscles tense up every time he touches them.

"Der, tell me to stop if you need to." Spencer traces the length of Derek's jawbone, resting his thumb on his lover's soft, plump lips. Heat courses through his body when Derek parts his lips and kisses the back of his hand, slowly nodding at Spencer's request. Spencer returns his lips to Derek's neck, satisfied when he lets out a soft, barely audible groan.

"That's it, baby. Relax." Spencer trails his kisses lower and lower, stopping long enough to suck on the tight skin surrounding his collar bone. He pulls away with a loud pop, his fingers tracing the newly purpled, swollen skin. "I'm gonna make you mine, Derek Morgan."

Derek's back arches in an intense mix of both pleasure and volatility as Spencer works his way down to the hem of his sweats, placing warm kisses through the fabric of his shirt and hovering for a moment before slowly pulling the shirt up and past his hard nipples. His breath catches in his throat at the dark, beautifully carved body below him. Derek's eyes snap open as he struggles to get a full breath of air. Spencer senses the panic in his eyes and grabs one of Derek's hands, guiding it to explore the unclothed, pale torso hovering above him.

At first, Derek keeps his hand deathly still, allowing the rapid thump of Spencer's heart to carry him away to a world all their own - a place where nothing but unhindered love and fierce passion can reach them, and a place far, far away from Carl Buford and Tobias Hankel. When he's relatively calm, Derek allows his fingertips to travel back over to Spencer's scar. He traces circles around the three inch white mark before leaning up on his elbows and kissing the area softly. Spencer lets out a groan of pleasure, boosting Derek's confidence as he wraps his arms tightly around the fragile male's bare back.

"Derek!" Spencer can't stop himself from yelling out when Derek starts to passionately suck on his neck as he teasingly strokes his nipples with his thumbs. Gasping for air, Spencer tugs at the neck of Derek's shirt, silently begging him to take it off. Derek obeys immediately, taking one of Spencer's nipples into his warm mouth as he tugs his shirt over his head and tosses it across the room. His hands grope frantically for Spencer's firm ass, pushing him up and back when he finds it.

Before either of them have time to process what's happening, Derek has climbed on top of Spencer and switched their positions. Spencer wraps his thin but strong legs around Derek's waist, thrusting up in a desperate attempt to get some friction between them. The man on top buries his hands into Spencer's thick hair and gives it a gentle tug. Spencer reacts by arching his head back and exposing the sensitive skin of his neck. Derek sticks out his tongue and traces the length of Spencer's pulsing vein, gasping for air himself when a skinny hand finds the rock in his pants. Derek freezes, and Spencer opens his eyes. They are so full of lust that it's all Derek can do to keep from ripping off both their pants and taking him then and there. Behind the hot flames of desire, sympathy twinkles deep within those light brown orbs.

"Baby, get on your back." When Derek hesitates to move, Spencer places a hand in the center of his chest and forces him off of him, flipping over so that he's on top again. He stares deeply into Derek's eyes as his hands carefully trail the length of his incredibly toned torso, daring to dip one finger below the stretchy material of his waistband. Derek screws his eyes shut and bites his bottom lip, but it doesn't take a profiling genius to see that his reaction is not one of pleasure.

"Spencer…" Derek starts, his entire body starting to tremble under the weight of his boyfriend. "I…"

"Shh," Spencer coos, leaning down to nip at one of Derek's ears as two, three, and four fingers wriggle their way inside of Derek's pants. "I know you want me, Der. I need you to trust me."

A dark hand comes up to stroke the side of Spencer's sweating face. "Okay. Okay, I trust you."

"Remember," Spencer reminds Derek, his heart practically exploding in his chest at the sight of big, bad Derek Morgan shaking timidly underneath of him. "All you have to do is tell me to stop." Derek nods softly, his breath flourishing as Spencer grabs hold of his hands and pins them down on the pillow behind his head. Derek knows not to move them when Spencer lets go, giving his partner his unwavering trust and full access to his body.

He starts at Derek's neck, taking his sweet time in sucking those beautiful, erect nipples before licking his way down the middle of his chest and back up again, stopping at the top for a deep, passionate kiss to the lips. Spencer works his way back down again, this time letting his tongue graze over Derek's cock, begging to be uncaged from his tight boxers and pants. He glances up to see Derek's mouth open just a crack, and takes it as his cue to continue.

"Oh, Spencer…" Big, chocolaty hands grip the edge of the bed in desperation as an incomparable warmth envelopes his rock hard member. "Feels good…" He whispers softly.

Spencer smiles to himself. If Derek is this turned on by Spencer's mouth skills through his pants, just wait until he takes the full length of his warm cock down his throat with ease. Spencer licks, nudges, and nibbles through the fabric until a big damp spot grows onto Derek's sweatpants, a wonderful concoction of the younger man's saliva and the older's pre-cum.

Spencer scoots down the bed so that he is positioned on his knees in between Derek's spread legs, pulling off the right and then left leg of his gray sweats and tossing them aside. He rubs Derek's large bulge through his silky boxers for a few minutes, wanting his boyfriend to be completely comfortable before exposing his entire body. When Derek's hips start to react to each little touch, squeeze, and tug, Spencer finally slides his boxers down to his ankles, taking in the sight of the biggest dick he's ever seen. He's only ever seen one other, but damn. Derek's rod is at least twice as long as his exes.

"Baby, you're so big." Derek's body tenses up again. Spencer puts a hand on his tummy and rubs it back and forth the way that he knows Derek likes, until he is calm again. He picks up Derek's boner and flicks the very tip of it with his tongue, savoring the sweet, slightly bitter taste of the clear liquid oozing out. He opens his mouth wide and encases the already wet head with the warmth of his breath, pushing it further and further into his mouth as a loud moan escapes from the mess of pillows and sheets above him.

"That feels...a-amazing. Oh my g-god. Spence, don't stop. Don't stop!" The broken words spilling out of Derek's mouth only encourages Spencer, who takes the throbbing cock harder and faster into his mouth, working some magic with his tongue all the while. "Fuck!" Spencer takes Derek's entire length, pausing with the massive cock shoved deep into his throat for a just a second before he starts to gag. When he pulls away, Derek takes the opportunity to pounce.

Derek swiftly climbs on top of Spencer and starts to kiss his lips sloppily, forcing his pink lips open and demanding entrance with his tongue. The taste of himself inside of Spencer's mouth is too much to bear. To Spencer's disappointment, he pulls away. "You wanna feel me inside of you, baby?"

Spencer nods feverishly as Derek's shaking hands fumble with the knot of Spencer's pants. Finally getting it undone, he pulls both them and his boxers down in one swoop. Spencer's dick stands at full attention, begging to be pleasured by the only person in the whole world who can make Spencer act this way.

For a moment, Derek just stares down at Spencer's naked, lithe body. It is almost too beautiful, too perfect, for his eyes to comprehend. Feeling as if he is under a microscope, Spencer's cheeks redden. Despite his fair build, Spencer is healthy and toned, though not nearly as much as Derek. He himself has been blessed in the manhood department, but not nearly as much as Derek has. Spencer self-consciously wraps his arms around his own torso as if he were giving himself a hug. Understanding, Derek takes his hands in his and pushes them down at his sides, uncovering his perfect body.

"You are the most incredible person I've ever met, Spence. Inside and out." He peppers the genius in light kisses to his cheeks, chin, and shoulders, deepening them as he works his way down his chest. Spencer places his hands on the back of Derek's head, encouraging but not pressing so hard that Derek feels pressured to do anything. He reaches Spencer's bony hips and learns that it is a specially tender spot for his boyfriend as he lightly sucks the skin around them.

"Mmhhh." Spencer's cock twitches at the sensation, savoring all of the wetness and warmth of Derek's plump lips against his bare skin.

Once he's covered the entire upper half of Spencer's body in deep kisses, light nibbles, and a few hickeys, Derek pauses. He's never been with a man before, and isn't exactly sure what to do next. Sure, he's watched as women and Spencer have given him blowjobs, but seeing it and doing it himself are two very different things.

Sensing his hesitation, Spencer opens his eyes and strokes Derek's chest. "It's alright, Der. Just take your time. There's no right or wrong way to do it."

Grateful for Spencer's patience and understanding, Derek trails his fingers up and down his boyfriend's abs, pushing his pride and ego as far back into his mind as he can when he speaks again. "Help me, Spencer."

A look of humiliation crosses Derek's face as he locks eyes with Spencer, who feels his heart tighten inside of his chest at Derek's almost pathetic tone of voice. He doesn't break eye-contact as he fumbles around for Derek's right hand. Finding it, he gently guides it to his shaft and gives it an encouraging squeeze. Derek wraps his fingers around Spencer's dick and holds it there, starting to clench and unclench his hand slowly. Spencer closes his eyes and lets Derek go at his own pace, though the soft pressure of his love's hand around his pulsating cock is absolutely torturous.

"Does...does it feel good?" Derek asks shyly, worried that he isn't doing the right things to pleasure his boyfriend.

"Yes," Spencer breathes, closing his own hand around Derek's and moving in an up and down motion. Derek looks down, watching as their two hands glide up and down the length Spencer's cock and fresh drops of pre-cum ooze out the tip. Derek nudges Spencer's hand away and takes over, grazing the hot liquid with his thumb and spreading it all around his shaft.

As Derek's confidence builds, his strokes grow faster and harder. Spencer thrusts his hips up into the air in a steady rhythm, fucking Derek's hand as the older man stares down in pure fascination. Soft moans escape Spencer's lips as Derek inches his face closer to Spencer's thighs.

At first, he just continues to jerk Spencer, his own dick begging for attention every time Spencer lets out a moan or whimper of pleasure. His face inches closer and closer to his dick until Derek can feel the heat off of it, daring to press it up against his cheek. He lets his eyes close and the soft, wet skin rubs against his face. Derek turns his head towards Spencer's member, sticking out his tongue and letting Spencer guide himself up and down slowly.

"Derek...p-please…" Spencer begs, being driven over the edge by his teasing manner. Pushed by Spencer's sweet, desperate begging, Derek finally slips his cock into his mouth. The taste is sweet, salty, and undeniably Spencer. The silkiness of Spencer's throbbing dick is absolutely intoxicating, and Derek finds himself bobbing his head up and down as if he has done it a thousand times before. "Yes, baby. Just like that." Spencer's voice stays calm and quiet despite his urge to scream Derek's name out loud. He wants their first experience together to be intimate and full of love. There will be plenty of other opportunities for the dirty stuff later. "Oh, that feels amazing."

Derek speeds up his pace, swirling his tongue around the base of Spencer's dick every time he takes it fully inside of his mouth. He alternates between slow and fast, deep and just the tip. "Derek, I -" A quick hand suddenly pushes Derek's forehead up until Spencer's cock falls out of his mouth. The absence of the meat rubbing against his cheeks and throat is instant. Derek longs to feel it again. "I don't want to cum yet," Spencer explains, grabbing Derek's chin and pulling him on top of him.

The feeling of their bare bodies pressing up against each other is all it takes for both men to assault one another's mouths. They fight for dominance for a few minutes, but Spencer eventually backs off and lets Derek take the reins, figuring he will be more comfortable that way. Their wet dicks slide against each other restlessly, their pre-cum mixing together in a pool on Spencer's stomach. Spencer starts to clench and unclench his ass, his moans becoming more desperate as all of the different sensations collide into one big fireworks display.

"Derek, I want you inside of me," he whispers, wrapping his arms around Derek's neck and his legs around his bare waist. Derek reaches down and grabs his own dick, rubbing himself up and down the length of Spencer's spread cheeks.

"I don't want to hurt you, baby." Derek presses his lips into Spencer's neck as hard as he can, feeling a small, swollen bump rising to the surface of the skin inside of his mouth.

"You - you won't," Spencer pants, selfishly hoping that Derek isn't going to back out after they've come this far.

"But it...it hurt m-me."

Spencer's heart breaks at Derek's words. He cups his chin between his thumb and forefinger and forces Derek to look into his eyes. "This is different, Der. I promise."

"O - okay." Derek plants a kiss on top of Spencer's damp forehead and sits up, leaning over into his dresser drawer to pull out a condom.

"Wait." Spencer's hand clamps around Derek's wrist. The older man looks down at him, confused. "I've only been with one person and I was tested afterwards. Are you clean, baby?"

"Uh - huh." Derek nods slowly. Before starting a relationship with Spencer, Derek was quite the lady-killer, and made it a habit to get himself checked at least once a year, despite always practicing safe sex.

"I want to feel you, Derek. I want to feel you inside of me with no barriers between us." Before Derek can even close the drawer, he's pulled back down into Spencer's embrace and nearly suffocated with a long, passionate kiss. They both come up for air, and one look tells them that it is both time.

"Is there anything I can do to...to make it better for you?" Derek asks, embarrassed that a man as experienced as him is asking for advice from a geeky man who he'd assumed was a virgin until he'd been told otherwise. Derek gently rubs his cock across Spencer's waiting hole as whimpers of pleasure escalate underneath of him.

Spencer places his own finger into his mouth and brings his arm down underneath of himself, slowly inserting it inside of his tight hole. His muscles expand and contract violently, but slowly begin to loosen with each gentle thrust. The sight of Spencer fingering himself only escalates Derek's longing, who strokes his dick in preparation to enter him. When he can't stand just watching any longer, Derek shoos Spencer's hand away and sticks his own in his mouth, bringing it out again and resting the tip of it at Spencer's entrance unsurely.

"It's okay, Der," Spencer encourages. "I'll tell you if it hurts."

Feeling better at Spencer's words, Derek slowly lets his finger slide into his boyfriend's ass. It is the softest, warmest thing he has ever felt in his life and much, much tighter than any woman he'd ever been with. Spencer throws his head back in pleasure as Derek's finger goes faster and faster, just grazing his sweet spot every time he pushes it all the way in. As his pathway loosens, Derek adds another finger, and then another.

"Fuck...Derek...that feels s-so good." Spencer bites his bottom lip at the dual sensation of being fucked in the ass with one of Derek's hands, and having his dick lightly stroked with the other. After three minutes of this, Spencer can't take anymore. "I'm ready, baby."

Derek's heart skips a few beats and his hands shake slightly as he rubs some spit onto his dick and positions it at Spencer's entrance. His lover looks up at him longingly, wanting to look deep into Derek's eyes as he slides into him for the first time. "Kiss me," he instructs, grabbing Derek's shoulders and pulling him down on top of him. As they kiss, Spencer bucks his hips softly against Derek's body, his cock twitching eagerly with each touch. When Derek makes no move to insert himself, Spencer reaches between his legs and guides him towards his hole, giving a few good jerks before letting go.

Derek breaks away from the kiss, looking into Spencer's loving eyes and knowing that it is finally time. "I love you, Pretty Boy," he coos, interlocking his hands with Spencer's and pressing them firmly on either side of his head.

"I love you too, Der."

They don't take their eyes off one another as Derek slowly pushes himself inside of Spencer, his dick being wrapped in a passionate warmth like nothing he has ever felt before. Derek starts very slowly, slipping all the way inside and pulling back out all the way to the tip. Below him, Spencer is left speechless by the incredible, heart-pounding sensation as Derek's cock rubs against his prostate. Spencer clenches his muscles around his dick, forcing Derek to howl out in pleasure.

Derek snuggles his head into the crook of Spencer's neck and closes his eyes, gently sucking the soft skin as Spencer rubs his hands up and down the tight muscles of his back. Derek quickens his pace as Spencer wraps his legs around him as tightly as he can, pressing himself hard into Derek's chest and rocking up and down in synchronization with Derek's thrusts.

"Fuck me, Derek," Spencer breathes into his ear, a gesture of passion rather than dirtiness. Derek pounds himself harder and harder into Spencer's tight ass, sucking his neck as hard as he can to keep from screaming out his name.

"B - baby…" Spencer stutters, trying to press his naked body even tighter against Derek than what it already is. "Don't stop. Please, don't stop. I'm so close. God...so close."

Derek raises his head just enough to see Spencer's face. There is nothing but intense pleasure, passion, and love painted across it as Spencer opens his mouth to moan but no words come out. The very sight is enough to send Derek over the edge, and he feels the tension building in his own cock as well.

"Yeah? You gonna cum for me, Pretty Boy?" Derek takes a fistful of Spencer's damp hair into his fist, tugging gently as a wave of euphoria starts to rise in more places than just his heart. "Say it. Say you're gonna cum for me." Derek pounds so hard into Spencer's warm hole that Spencer can barely hear himself breathing over the sound of their thighs smacking together.

"I...I…" Spencer sputters, arching his back as high as he can underneath of Derek's weight as his body begins to twitch involuntarily.

"Say it!" Derek commands, his voice demanding, but still soft and full of passion.

"I'm g-gonna c-cum s-so hard for y-you, Der. Fuckkkk!"

Spencer's eyes roll into the back of his head as his hands clutch for something - anything - to hold onto. He finds Derek's arms and bores his fingernails into the dark skin of his lover as a brilliant, almost blinding wave of pleasure washes over his entire body and renders his muscles useless. The sight of Spencer's intense orgasm, combined with his hot and sticky cum that spills out onto both of their stomachs, is all Derek needs to finish.

"You want me to fill your pretty little ass up with my seed?" Derek has no idea where any of this is coming from, but watching Spencer submit to him is almost enough in itself to make him cum.

"Yes, Derek. I want it! I want you to cum deep inside of me! Mmhh...baby, cum for me. Please, please, please cum for me."

Derek thrusts into Spencer one last time, all of his weight crashing down on top of his lover's frail body as his senses take over. His dick pulses in fast intervals inside of Spencer's tight ass as his cum shoots deep inside of him, filling Spencer with his warm, undeniable love.

"FUCK!" He wails, burying his face into Spencer's hair as sharp fingernails dig deeply into his back. Derek lets out a series of moans, each one growing quieter than the last until stopping all together. Nothing can be heard after that aside from their deep breathing.

Against his body's protest, Derek forces himself up onto his knees to relieve Spencer of his weight, leaning down and giving him one last passionate kiss before slowly pulling his softening dick out of Spencer. They both groan in pleasure as the last few inches slip out, spilling some of his seed onto Spencer's toned cheeks.

"Stay there, baby," Derek coos, standing up on wobbly legs and staggering into the bathroom to wet a towel. He returns just seconds later, stopping in his tracks to admire Spencer's naked body stretched out on top of the sheets. He crawls back onto the bed and starts to clean him up, first wiping his belly and then his tender, already sore bottom. He then uses it on himself, cleaning Spencer's cum from his own stomach and then wiping his dick.

Without a word, Derek tosses the used towel onto the floor and sinks into the sheets, smiling softly when Spencer curls up against him. He pulls the comforter up over their bodies and wraps both of his arms around Spencer, content with the way his bare skin feels against his own.

The couple lies in silence for a while, Derek stroking Spencer's hair as he slowly lulls his boyfriend to sleep. As his breaths become shallow and Spencer begins to jerk now and again, Derek calls out his name.

"Spence?"

"Hmm?" He grunts lazily.

"I love you."

"I love you, too." Spencer nuzzles his head underneath of Derek's chin, his heart fluttering when a familiar set of lips connect with the top of his head.

"Oh, and uh, Spence?"

"Hmm?"

"That felt really good."

Spencer doesn't say anything, but Derek can feel his cheeks spreading into a grin against his bare chest. Holding this man in his arms is absolutely gratifying - knowing all of his secrets, tracing over his scars protectively, holding his hand so that the whole world knows that Spencer is his...it is simply the greatest feeling in the world. Despite everything that Carl did to him, despite everything that Tobias did to Spencer, against all odds, their two tortured souls collided into one, beautiful being tonight. For the first time since he went to that cabin with Buford, Derek feels at ease with himself and the world. He reaches up to swipe a single tear from his cheek, and then looks down lovingly at the man pressed so tightly against his side.

"Baby, I'm gonna turn the light off now, okay?"

Long, skinny arms tighten around his waist as Derek's hand finds the bedside lamp and flicks it off. Quiet whimpers fill the silence in the room as a warm face buries itself deep into Derek's chest.

"Shh. I got you, Spence. I'll never let go."

Derek's hand habitually combs through Spencer's soft tuft of hair until the whimpers subside and are replaced with gentle snores.

"I'll never, ever let you go."


End file.
